Being accessible makes you more valuable to the people you lead and the organization. Staff must feel comfortable approaching you when they need to. The benefits to you are that you keep your finger on the pulse of the organization and are better equipped to avert problems and take advantages of opportunities as they occur. Also by using your accessibility as a teaching tool in the form of probing questions you are creating a training session that conditions your subordinates to think through their concerns, questions or problems. Your work time as a leader is just as valuable your subordinate's. Don't waste it by being the answer man or woman.
There are always exceptions to the rule. You will be giving direction in emergency situations or when facing time deadlines.
People know the right answers and as leaders we have the obligation to create an environment that supports thinking out loud and the confidence to express views, questions, comments and concerns without fear or judgment. You are a confidence builder, not a creator of self doubt. Become a force multiplier. Teach your staff to think by effectively using questions rather that statements or direction.
Ask others about themselves, at the same time, be on guard not to talk too much about yourself.
- Mortimer Jerome Adler
Let's talk about listening. Most of us listen with the intent to respond immediately to views that do not conform to our own. In our desire to get our point across much of the information being given to us is lost because we are too busy formulating a response. This attack listening causes some important interpersonal problems. First you are sending a negative message that says you do not value the information and the individual presenting it. Second you are demonstrating a lack of respect for the individual and sending the message that only your views and opinions are important.
The result is that employees will not come to you and share information, comments, suggestions or concerns. As a result your performance and your company's will suffer. It may even lead to the loss of your job. The fastest way to become an ex-leader is to be known as someone who does not listen.
I am sure you have heard the reason God gave us two ears and one mouth is that we're supposed to listen twice as much as we speak.
The best way to ensure that you are listening twice as much as you speak is simply to shut up and listen.
Try the following techniques to improve your listening skills.
1. Repeat in your mind's voice every word that is being said to you. Think of it as echoing what you hear. I guarantee you won't be blurting out responses. Practice this skill during your commute, repeating in your mind's voice what you hear on the radio. An added benefit of using this technique is you will remember information you hear much easier and more completely.
2. Ask questions for clarification using a thoughtful gentle tone of voice.
3. Nod your head, use the standard non verbal um hum, aha, etc.
4. Look the person in the eyes and ask if he or she would mind if you took a few notes. People are always flattered when you ask permission to take notes.
5. Prior to giving your response summarize what was said to you. This extra effort demonstrates that you listened intently and understand what was said. If no correction is necessary, make your response.
Studies have demonstrated that the best conversationalists are the best listeners, who ask specific questions that help to move the conversation along. When you take a step back and think about who controls the conversation it's the person asking the questions. So there is no need for you to practice attack listening. You will get your views across through the questions you ask and your staff will have tremendous trust and confidence in you.
Everybody wins with good listening skills.
Silences make the real conversations between friends. Not the saying but the never needing to say is what counts. - Margaret Lee Runbeck
If you are experiencing fear about deciding to be a leader, laugh your fears away by following this simple plan. Kenneth E. Strong, Jr, can help you eliminate those fears and give you the confidence to lead.
Download you copy of "Leadership Is A Choice" today at http://www.decidingtolead.com
Feel free to use this article, in your publications, newsletters, blogs, e-zines and web sites in its entirety provided you include the following: Copyright 2008 All rights reserved. Kenneth E Strong, Jr. http://www.decidingtolead.com Front Row Connections, LLC, Virginia Beach, Virginia.
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